Do you like my story?

This is a story I have written. Please comment your opinion!!

 

   Erin Cahill suddenly awoke from a dreamless sleep to running water from the bathroom. She sat straight up, seeing a skinny rectangle of light on the wall in front of her. She looked around her hotel room. Since she was an orphan, she had gotten strange jobs to earn money. This was her last night she was able to stay, with only enough money to but a little bit of food and water tomorrow. She saw the bathroom door slightly open, and, with squinted eyes, she stepped out of bed, placing her bare feet onto the cold hardwood floor. She tip-toed over to the door, and pushed it open. She was kicked to the ground, and a bag of some sort was thrown over her head. 

 

    Erin was pinned down with a strong grip, and although she struggled, she couldn't escape. She felt her wrists and ankles being tied. She then was lifted up and placed into what seemed to be a laundry cart. Erin's captives covered her with towels, making it impossible to move. She was rolled out of her room and down the hall. Between the bag and towels, it was very difficult to breathe. Before passing out, she thought, What if I d*e?

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 Leafwhisker  the Shapshifter

Stormy

Wolfstar

Lulu

Tigerfang

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Hornetflick

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VChristianV

In God we Trust

 

If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all. ~Thumper

 

I am mostly insane. You?

 

 

#Tomboy

Bump I want to see if peeps like this before I begin to post more. I have six and a half college ruled pages so please give comments!

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 Leafwhisker  the Shapshifter

Stormy

Wolfstar

Lulu

Tigerfang

Hayley

Hornetflick

Hornetfire

Daisyleaf

Whitefoot

 

VChristianV

In God we Trust

 

If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all. ~Thumper

 

I am mostly insane. You?

 

 

#Tomboy

I picked no by accident but I ment yes.

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Call me Le Feu à l'intérieur (French for The Fire Inside... at least I hope it is, I used an online translator that does not always work) 

 

This is Dawn's other account. 

 

Thank you! Need a couple more comments, then I'll post more!

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 Leafwhisker  the Shapshifter

Stormy

Wolfstar

Lulu

Tigerfang

Hayley

Hornetflick

Hornetfire

Daisyleaf

Whitefoot

 

VChristianV

In God we Trust

 

If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all. ~Thumper

 

I am mostly insane. You?

 

 

#Tomboy

Maybe I'll just post another paragraph or so. . . . . . . .

 

  What must have been many hours later, Erin awoke. Groggily she lifted her head, looking around at her surroundings. She was in a crate-type thing, to short to sit up in, but not long enough to lay down in comfortably. Erin rubbed the bruise on her head, and then felt a sharp twinge in the back of her neck. Stunned, she went still for a moment, then reached behind her and pulled a dart from herself. It was silver, and engraved in it were the letters 'SBT'. She could see the tip of it was a strange reddish-orange color.  She realized with a jolt of horror it was most likely a dr*g. The serum was taking effect, and her eyelids felt heavy. Her whole body felt tingly. Just before she lost concicness, she thought, What will happen to me when I wake up. . . . if I ever do . . . .

 

 

 

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 Leafwhisker  the Shapshifter

Stormy

Wolfstar

Lulu

Tigerfang

Hayley

Hornetflick

Hornetfire

Daisyleaf

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VChristianV

In God we Trust

 

If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all. ~Thumper

 

I am mostly insane. You?

 

 

#Tomboy

Great!

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Call me Le Feu à l'intérieur (French for The Fire Inside... at least I hope it is, I used an online translator that does not always work) 

 

This is Dawn's other account. 

 

Thanks! This weekend I'll post more.

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 Leafwhisker  the Shapshifter

Stormy

Wolfstar

Lulu

Tigerfang

Hayley

Hornetflick

Hornetfire

Daisyleaf

Whitefoot

 

VChristianV

In God we Trust

 

If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all. ~Thumper

 

I am mostly insane. You?

 

 

#Tomboy

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soccerraven43

I love it!

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{Blitz}

 

Then they pull back, make other plans; I understand. I'm just a liability...

 

 #AllPeopleArePeople

#TheScriptUnite

 

Dan 

Thistleshade

Danny

Mark

Glen

More gang members: /277938

 

Song of the Week: Liability by Lorde

 

 

 

 

Thanks! I'm posting some of da story later :)

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 Leafwhisker  the Shapshifter

Stormy

Wolfstar

Lulu

Tigerfang

Hayley

Hornetflick

Hornetfire

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VChristianV

In God we Trust

 

If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all. ~Thumper

 

I am mostly insane. You?

 

 

#Tomboy

Here it is. . .

 

   Erin woke up to the sound of yipping. What the . . . She didn't remember being around dogs before she had blacked out that last time. She opened an eye to see she was very, very low to the group, surrounded by puppies, and in what seemed like a cardboard box. She sat up slowly, but wasn't much taller than when she was lying down. This can not be right. She looked down and nearly doubled over, eyes widening greatly. Instead of hands and feet, she had . . . paws! Brindle, white, and reddish paws!

 

 

I'll post more later or tomorrow

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 Leafwhisker  the Shapshifter

Stormy

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Tigerfang

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VChristianV

In God we Trust

 

If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all. ~Thumper

 

I am mostly insane. You?

 

 

#Tomboy

Bump!

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 Leafwhisker  the Shapshifter

Stormy

Wolfstar

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Hornetflick

Hornetfire

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VChristianV

In God we Trust

 

If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all. ~Thumper

 

I am mostly insane. You?

 

 

#Tomboy

ok, here:

 

 There was a sudden jolt, and Erin, the puppies, and the box shifted forward. With a yip of surprise, Erin tumbled forward, falling onto her face, which was now a blunt muzzle. She continued to tumble forward until she landed smack! right into a huge, tan male puppy. "Hey, watch it!" the male puppy growled softly, eyes fixed above Erin, over the top of the box. "Sorry," squeaked Erin, skittering back, ears pressed back. Man, my. . dog. . instinct kicks in with the submission stuff immediately. "It's okay," the male said, looking back down onto her for the first time. "Anyways, you've been asleep since the longpaw came and brought you here. Are you all right?" It took a moment for Erin to understand that a 'longpaw' was a human. "Yeah, I'm fine. . ." Erin began, but suddenly there was a loud clanking sound, and a beam of weak sunlight peering into the box.

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 Leafwhisker  the Shapshifter

Stormy

Wolfstar

Lulu

Tigerfang

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Hornetflick

Hornetfire

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VChristianV

In God we Trust

 

If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all. ~Thumper

 

I am mostly insane. You?

 

 

#Tomboy

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platinumdragon2816

That's pretty good!

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~*} Dusk {*~Franklin is a llama...

[]Queen of Snow Leopards[]

 

 <~> I'm a RANDOM!!!!! <~>

 

"Unless your name is Google stop acting like you know everything"- unknown

 

 

 

 

 

      

 

Thnx :) Here are more :D

 

All the puppies scampered backward as a large, burly man picked the box up, and as he walked, he seemed to roughly shake it purposly. "What's happening?" Erin whimpered, her flanks trembling. "I don't know, but I don't think it's good," the male puppy answered softly, trying to see outside of the box.

 

 

The box shifted constantly in the man's grasp. Erin felt the box suddenly and violently be thrown into the air. All the puppies howled in fear as the box tipped in midair, scattering the puppies, the man's rough laughter echoing in Erin's skull. Erin saw the tan male hit the ground with a sickening thud. She gasped, and another moment later she landed on a small piece of concreate. She saw stars, and hen everything went black.

 

                                                                                                     l l l l l l

 

 "Hey, c'mon, wake up! Somebody is coming!"

 

Groggily, Erin sat up, looking around. The male tan pup, a  was nudging her away from thundering footsteps. She leaped up, slightly weak on her feet, and the pair began to run. But suddenly a female longpaw stepped in front of them, quickly picking both up. Erin yipped in dismay as she was lifted into the air. She tried to escape, but the longpaw's grip was firm. She carried the two over to a loudcage, opened a crate door, and set Erin and the other pup in, then shutting the door and locking it.

 

"That went great," growled the male pup. Erin whimpered softly, but didn't reply. More puppies were put in different crates. Soon, the loudcage started, and it rumbled off. Erin pressed her self against the male, buried her face into her paws, and fell asleep. 

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 Leafwhisker  the Shapshifter

Stormy

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Lulu

Tigerfang

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Hornetflick

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VChristianV

In God we Trust

 

If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all. ~Thumper

 

I am mostly insane. You?

 

 

#Tomboy

Here IS more, not are XD

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 Leafwhisker  the Shapshifter

Stormy

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VChristianV

In God we Trust

 

If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all. ~Thumper

 

I am mostly insane. You?

 

 

#Tomboy

Here is more. . . . .

 

When Erin woke up, the first thing she noticed was that she and the other pup were being carried to what looked like a kennel. Great, now I'm going to be a captive, she thought miserably. The longpaw carrying the crate opened the kennel door, set the crate down, opened the crate door, and walked outside of the kennel, shutting the door and locking it. The longpaw seemed to be talking to them, but, very frustrated, could only understand a few words: Be okay', 'Be fine', and 'Maple and Fury'. Were 'Maple' and 'Fury' their new names? I can't understand the language I used just yesterday! she thought, furious. If Maple and Fury really our new names, I guess I'm Maple. I gotta get used to that now.

 

 

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 Leafwhisker  the Shapshifter

Stormy

Wolfstar

Lulu

Tigerfang

Hayley

Hornetflick

Hornetfire

Daisyleaf

Whitefoot

 

VChristianV

In God we Trust

 

If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all. ~Thumper

 

I am mostly insane. You?

 

 

#Tomboy