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stormbreeze48

Wow, it's been a while... we should revive this.

 

God Loves You All! 

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*~Storm~*

 

"Do not be overcome by evil,

but overcome evil with good."

~Romans 12:21

 

 

Fullsig@/272051

 

#Pray

#Casper #Midoraka #Xcurgle #Glaudia

#NiceDeliveryDudes #EveryPersonNeedsAKazoo

#Moresigspa-

 



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redwolf988

It has been. I haven't been on much lately. But hey I'm putting up seven more RPs when my boyfriend comes back to Ohio. So I'll be on more active then. He is joining two of them so I look forwards to writing with him. I haven't made any new RPs they are just revived RPs one of them changed slightly to be more interesting. 

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CassLunice

 

Bump and Elemental Master

 

Pilot Of the Yellow Lion

 

Gang: Me, E, C, S, M, F, E, C, L, A, K

 

#Casper

The real reason girls wear dresses: we're too lazy to put on pants ~ Me

 

Full sig @ /283447

 

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stormbreeze48

Yeah me neither I've really only been getting on for Lab Sweet Lab and Silver's Run and Hide RP that's about dead right now.

Oh cool. Then you can personally nag him if he's one of those "im going to make a form but then never pov and disappear off the face of the earth" types of people, but hopefully he's not.

June 10th was Jayhawk's gotcha day. On June 10th I was supposed to be going to a Bat Mitzvah party. And I was like Mom, what are you doing we have to hurry up and go why are we going outside, oh, what's this puppy doing here? He used to be small but now he's real big... but I still love my boy. Even when he thinks he can dig into the hardwood floor and won't stop with a simple "No."

 

God Loves You All! 

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*~Storm~*

 

"Do not be overcome by evil,

but overcome evil with good."

~Romans 12:21

 

 

Fullsig@/272051

 

#Pray

#Casper #Midoraka #Xcurgle #Glaudia

#NiceDeliveryDudes #EveryPersonNeedsAKazoo

#Moresigspa-

 



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redwolf988

I don't think Connor will be one of those people, he's more like "I was going to POV today but then I was distracted by video games". Either way I'll nag him though *Finger guns* Girlfriend rights. He's pretty creative so I think he'll be interesting to RP with. 

 

Aww, happy late gotcha day to Jayhawk. I hope he's doing well. He sounds adorable even with the digging issue but *Glaces over at own dogs* they all have similar issues. Luckily mine is carpet and not hardwood. 

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CassLunice

 

Bump and Elemental Master

 

Pilot Of the Yellow Lion

 

Gang: Me, E, C, S, M, F, E, C, L, A, K

 

#Casper

The real reason girls wear dresses: we're too lazy to put on pants ~ Me

 

Full sig @ /283447

 

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chessreading34

are you talking about warriors cats by erin hunter? im in

iwarriors

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moonlightmystery143

oh wow this exists again

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✧・゚: *✧ASTERIA✧*:・゚✧

⸺–writing mom ✧ cat dealer–⸺

the world needs this luminary of

 the stars to shine even brighter!

 

should i stay, should i go, should i

run far away to the point where

i cant even see the universe?

⸻⸺⸺ ✧ ⸻⸺⸺

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dragonmoonlight221

More like still exists

 

*quickly throws up a forcefield to protect from Storm’s Doritos*

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                    Jasper

HUFFLEPUFF FOR THCUP

#Casper

 

Wizard

Seeker

Jedi Knight

Knight of Dawn

Caretaker

Demigod, Son of Athena

Priest of Thoth

 

Founder of Ship Weddings(No Idea if There Are Still Any)

 

 

 Host of Bast

 

 

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moonlightmystery143

shhhh, it exists again not still

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✧・゚: *✧ASTERIA✧*:・゚✧

⸺–writing mom ✧ cat dealer–⸺

the world needs this luminary of

 the stars to shine even brighter!

 

should i stay, should i go, should i

run far away to the point where

i cant even see the universe?

⸻⸺⸺ ✧ ⸻⸺⸺

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stormbreeze48

Oh, you can have them, I have other snacks haha.

 

Yeah this does exist again whoag.

 

I got a new macbook pro so that's pretty exciting. It's nice to have a new computer and I can just sit down on a nice couch instead of sitting on a cushioned folding chair in a hot room.

 

God Loves You All! 

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*~Storm~*

 

"Do not be overcome by evil,

but overcome evil with good."

~Romans 12:21

 

 

Fullsig@/272051

 

#Pray

#Casper #Midoraka #Xcurgle #Glaudia

#NiceDeliveryDudes #EveryPersonNeedsAKazoo

#Moresigspa-

 



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stormbreeze48

And my parents have been away for almost 2 weeks but they came home! At 1:15 am! It's nice to see them again. It's just been me and my 19 year old sister so we've been okay, but it's nice to have them back. Jayhawk was very excited to see my dad since father is his favorite. 

 

God Loves You All! 

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*~Storm~*

 

"Do not be overcome by evil,

but overcome evil with good."

~Romans 12:21

 

 

Fullsig@/272051

 

#Pray

#Casper #Midoraka #Xcurgle #Glaudia

#NiceDeliveryDudes #EveryPersonNeedsAKazoo

#Moresigspa-

 



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redwolf988

Whoa! Jasper, I haven't talked to you in ages! How are you? 

 

I miss chatting here all the time. We all need to get back in the habit of it. 

 

So how is everyones summers? 

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CassLunice

 

Bump and Elemental Master

 

Pilot Of the Yellow Lion

 

Gang: Me, E, C, S, M, F, E, C, L, A, K

 

#Casper

The real reason girls wear dresses: we're too lazy to put on pants ~ Me

 

Full sig @ /283447

 

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moonlightmystery143

mm, this could definitely use some spicy revival

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✧・゚: *✧ASTERIA✧*:・゚✧

⸺–writing mom ✧ cat dealer–⸺

the world needs this luminary of

 the stars to shine even brighter!

 

should i stay, should i go, should i

run far away to the point where

i cant even see the universe?

⸻⸺⸺ ✧ ⸻⸺⸺

Thumbnail avatar 61c44956a3

stormbreeze48

It's pretty good. It's going by fast like I just realized 5 days from now I'll be a month into summer and I'm not ready!

Well, it was pretty good... until Monday happened and I got sick. I'm going on another missions trip to Brazil this year and you need to take medicine or get shots so you don't catch diseases like malaria and typhoid... and on Sunday night I took a typhoid pill... and then I woke up feeling tied, despite getting a healthy amount of sleep, and maybe a bit nauseous? I don't remember exactly... Yeah, I think it was something with the pill, because like 40-50 minutes after waking up and having a small breakfast, I had like this intense stomach pain. It was like a cramp, but 3 times worse and it was in my stomach and it hurt so badly... and I couldn't take any painkillers becuase my parents were worried about the painkillers messing with my stomach... so eventually after flopping around in bed for about an hour, my parents or someone made me eat some crackers so then my stomach acids could absorb something other than my stomach, which I guess was causing the pain?? I dunno... the crackers helped... because then i puked soon enough. And the stomach pain was gone! Then I lasped into a cycle of sleeping and waking up and puking and maybe eating something or maybe not and then sleeping again...

Until finally in the evening I was able to get some medicine in me so now I'm feeling better, just have to get into the routine of things being normal and eating normal foods instead of crackers, applesauce, and jello.

Oh and it just hit me today that my sister is going to be leaving on Friday, and that's like... one day.
You see, my parents went on a cruise for about two weeks, so it was just me and my sister in the house taking care of Jayhawk, and we actually did pretty well together, and we kind of grew closer, I think. We watched a show, read a book... So now my sister is going down to Brazil early... because she can. She's been studying portuguese at college and so she's going down there to help out and do whatever she can.
I think I'm going to miss her more than I did before...
I dunno it just now hit me.
Big things don't really hit me until like a day or two before, or when its actually the day of something. I don't know, it just takes a while for the thing to sink in and actually seem real, if that makes sense.

 

Please go through!

 

God Loves You All! 

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*~Storm~*

 

"Do not be overcome by evil,

but overcome evil with good."

~Romans 12:21

 

 

Fullsig@/272051

 

#Pray

#Casper #Midoraka #Xcurgle #Glaudia

#NiceDeliveryDudes #EveryPersonNeedsAKazoo

#Moresigspa-

 



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moonlightmystery143

^^ i can confirm every bit of the getting sick story, she live blogged for like two days in cord, we heard every detail of it and it is in fact accurate to what happened

also whee forgot to answer the question about summer and nows as good a time as ever to actually answer

uhhhhhhhhh its going pretty good id say, like storm said its going by a lot quicker than i thought it was i guess, uhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

i dont really know, i dont have a lot to talk about. ive just been hanging out at home and the like, nothing too special has really happened i guess unless you count miryu and such and youve already heard a lifetimes worth of me rambling about miryu so ill spare you

obviously felt a nickname change was in check!! ive been focusing a lot on getting my garbage life together and i guess eris didnt really fit me anymore so now im //fingerguns// asteria

ill spare you from the rambling, i say, as i ramble away... what about you? hows life been treating you?

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✧・゚: *✧ASTERIA✧*:・゚✧

⸺–writing mom ✧ cat dealer–⸺

the world needs this luminary of

 the stars to shine even brighter!

 

should i stay, should i go, should i

run far away to the point where

i cant even see the universe?

⸻⸺⸺ ✧ ⸻⸺⸺

Thumbnail avatar 61c44956a3

stormbreeze48

Yeah, you should actually talk on cord. Or talk to us here. Or just talk to us in general please! Come on Cass we gotta revive this together!

I've had a longish day, I guess. My sister's plane to get to Miami, and then connect to Brazil took off at 5am. Meaning we had to leave the house at like 3 to get to the airport on time. Meaning I had to wake up at 2:30 or smth to get ready. Of course as I was trying to sleep my brain wouldn't settle down, from stuff about life and God to stuff about my character's name sp uhhhh yeah it was hard to finally sleep. And then when I woke up I was so tired. It didn't even feel like anything was real I was just that tired.
But oh man my poor dad. He was flying back from his weekly/every other weekly business trips and his flights got delayed so he got in at like midnight and made it to the house at one so he only got like an hour of sleep. He didn't even go to his bed, he just slept on the couch. And he still managed to drive us to the airport and back at 3am. Then again, there's barely any cars on the highway at that point, so he could drive bad and we'd still be fine. 

And then after we got her there and made sure she was going to be fine we drove back and it was 4:20am so it was a great time and then I eventually went back to sleep, so I guess that was a fun little adventure to the airport and back.
I like driving at night though, because its all dark and then all the lights will be lit up and it just looks pretty. If only the sky was clear, then I could've seen the stars...

But it's actually been like 60-70 degrees here with overcast skies so its actually pretty nice where I am... its almost cold, since before we were having 80s and 90s constantly.

 

God Loves You All! 

 

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*~Storm~*

 

"Do not be overcome by evil,

but overcome evil with good."

~Romans 12:21

 

 

Fullsig@/272051

 

#Pray

#Casper #Midoraka #Xcurgle #Glaudia

#NiceDeliveryDudes #EveryPersonNeedsAKazoo

#Moresigspa-

 



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dragonmoonlight221

My summer started really late, because we started school really late. We didn’t get out until June 7th! It was horrific.

 

I went to Houston, Texas, with my dad and sister to go to NASA for three days a few weeks ago, and that was pretty fun. The first time. He takes us every year, and the exhibits never change, so it was kind of monotonous, but it was fun anyway! We did get to touch a rock from Mars! Don’t ask me how it got there, because I don’t know.

 

Last week, I volunteered at my church, helping with the Vacation Bible Camp for three nights, and that was a lot of fun. I ran the snack cart with a friend that I invited from school.

 

My grandmother had been having some problems for a while, and then she fell and had to go to the ER. She seemed okay, and went home, but then she had a stroke on last Saturday, and died two days later, so that’s been hard.

 

I’m currently in Colorado with my parents and sister for two weeks. We just got here yesterday, so we haven’t done anything fun yet, but I will be sure to give updates when that happens!

 

When we get back, I have literally one day at home, then I turn around and go on mission trip with my Youth group. We’re going to Victoria, Texas, for a week to do hurricane relief.

 

So yeah. I think that’s it. How about y’all?

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                    Jasper

HUFFLEPUFF FOR THCUP

#Casper

 

Wizard

Seeker

Jedi Knight

Knight of Dawn

Caretaker

Demigod, Son of Athena

Priest of Thoth

 

Founder of Ship Weddings(No Idea if There Are Still Any)

 

 

 Host of Bast

 

 

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redwolf988

Sorry to hear that you got sick Storm, that sounds absolutely horrible. Sorry for my lack of being on. I'm going on vacation for the second time in my life either late this summer or early next summer and my mom has some ridiculous rules set for being able to go. One of which is that between the hours of 12:30 and 6 we are not allowed in our rooms and not allowed to touch any tecnology. So the time I do have on I spend trying to work on the next chapter of WSF (Not that anyone really reads it anymore but whatever), and POVing. Not to mention the fact that Connor and my friends drag me out of the house all the time so I can have a social life... 

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CassLunice

 

Bump and Elemental Master

 

Pilot Of the Yellow Lion

 

Gang: Me, E, C, S, M, F, E, C, L, A, K

 

#Casper

The real reason girls wear dresses: we're too lazy to put on pants ~ Me

 

Full sig @ /283447

 

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stormbreeze48

@Jasper:

Hmmm, how did the space rock get to Earth? Is it really from Mars, or is it just a fake to trick you into having faith in NASA's abilities, hmmmm?

Aww, I'm sorry about your Grandma.
Oh, Colorado? That's my neighbor. Its mountains are pretty. Have fun there!

Oh wow you've had a busy summer already.

I've been mainly just hanging out at home and going to the weekly trumpet meetups to practice music and hang out and play frisbee. 

@Cassy:
Oh yikes that's harsh. Geez, what did you do to your rooms that you can't go in them anymore? Or what is she doing in your rooms, hmmm? That's awfully suspicious...

C'mon Cassy stop having a social life, that's no fun.

 

God Loves You All! 

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*~Storm~*

 

"Do not be overcome by evil,

but overcome evil with good."

~Romans 12:21

 

 

Fullsig@/272051

 

#Pray

#Casper #Midoraka #Xcurgle #Glaudia

#NiceDeliveryDudes #EveryPersonNeedsAKazoo

#Moresigspa-

 



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redwolf988

LOL Storm, no it's just because my mom feels like we all ignore each other and hide in our rooms so she's forcing us to stay out of them, which I have not problem with. I'm just peeved that I can't get on my computer to draw or write.

 

Yeah you'd have to go bug Connor for that one, I don't invite people out I'm invited out. 

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CassLunice

 

Bump and Elemental Master

 

Pilot Of the Yellow Lion

 

Gang: Me, E, C, S, M, F, E, C, L, A, K

 

#Casper

The real reason girls wear dresses: we're too lazy to put on pants ~ Me

 

Full sig @ /283447

 

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dragonmoonlight221

*gasps* Cassy, you don’t have a social life? How is this possible?

 

I’ve been gone for a long time. Who’s Connor?

 

@Storm: I didn’t know you played trumpet? For school or otherwise?

 

 

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                    Jasper

HUFFLEPUFF FOR THCUP

#Casper

 

Wizard

Seeker

Jedi Knight

Knight of Dawn

Caretaker

Demigod, Son of Athena

Priest of Thoth

 

Founder of Ship Weddings(No Idea if There Are Still Any)

 

 

 Host of Bast

 

 

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stormbreeze48

Ohhh I guess that makes sense.

And I'm the same way. I mean in my head it'd be nice to invite someone over, but then I never do. 

 

Yeah I play the trumpet for school but I'll try and practice everyday... I'm going to be a freshmen, which means I'll be starting over at the bottom of the school hierarchy and band hierarchy. So I gotta work harder. I mean recently I haven't been playing as much... I just kinda stopped for no real reason and kept on procrastinating on it but now I'm ready to get back into it. Espeically with a sectional tomorrow. I gotta practice my music. Basically a sectional is a time when a certain group of instruments gets together and they work on their music. Except high school sectionals are 50% actual playing and 50% hey lets hike up to the park and play ultimate frisbee. According to my drum major friend that I know because my sister is friends with her - it's to get people to keep on coming so they have fun or whatever. And you get to bond too, which is nice, because its harder since I'm one of 4 girls out of 18 people, you know?

 

God Loves You All! 

 

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*~Storm~*

 

"Do not be overcome by evil,

but overcome evil with good."

~Romans 12:21

 

 

Fullsig@/272051

 

#Pray

#Casper #Midoraka #Xcurgle #Glaudia

#NiceDeliveryDudes #EveryPersonNeedsAKazoo

#Moresigspa-

 



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dragonmoonlight221

@Storm: Yikes. Four girls out of 18? 14 freshman boys? You have my sympathy. 

 

I’m in Percussion in my band. I’m going into eighth grade as first chair, so that’s a little nerve-wracking, but also really satisfying, because I worked really hard.

 

Yeah, it’s hard to practice over the summer. I’ve probably touched my snare drum three times since school ended, and the first time was to take it out of me backpack. 

 

My school doesn’t have a professional Percussion director, so Sectionals for us are few and far between, which is sad, because they’re usually a lot of fun.

 

@Storm-Cassy: The other day, my mom asked me, “Do you want to invite (insert friend’s name here) to come over and swim?” (We have a pool in our backyard). I was like, “Uh, okay.”

 

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                    Jasper

HUFFLEPUFF FOR THCUP

#Casper

 

Wizard

Seeker

Jedi Knight

Knight of Dawn

Caretaker

Demigod, Son of Athena

Priest of Thoth

 

Founder of Ship Weddings(No Idea if There Are Still Any)

 

 

 Host of Bast

 

 

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dragonmoonlight221

Hey, Cassy. I was looking at that Rebellion RP you’re doing. Is that Connor the same Connor that you keep talking about from IRL? Your boyfriend?

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                    Jasper

HUFFLEPUFF FOR THCUP

#Casper

 

Wizard

Seeker

Jedi Knight

Knight of Dawn

Caretaker

Demigod, Son of Athena

Priest of Thoth

 

Founder of Ship Weddings(No Idea if There Are Still Any)

 

 

 Host of Bast

 

 

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redwolf988

@Jasper: Yeah, that's him. Such a creative person right? I assumed he'd go with something different like Assasin, or some plant or reptilian name or one of the million nicknames people from my friend group (including myself) call him but he went with his real name. But yeah that's my RL BF, we've been dating since December 7th. He's the DM of my D&D session and he's really creative so I asked him if he'd be interested in RPing with me since I'm constantly talking all about the SAMB IRL. He agreed to join one but I don't think he'll do much, he prefers to play videogames and be out with his dog and plants. 

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CassLunice

 

Bump and Elemental Master

 

Pilot Of the Yellow Lion

 

Gang: Me, E, C, S, M, F, E, C, L, A, K

 

#Casper

The real reason girls wear dresses: we're too lazy to put on pants ~ Me

 

Full sig @ /283447

 

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dragonmoonlight221

Well, congratulations! I’m glad you’ve found someone.

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                    Jasper

HUFFLEPUFF FOR THCUP

#Casper

 

Wizard

Seeker

Jedi Knight

Knight of Dawn

Caretaker

Demigod, Son of Athena

Priest of Thoth

 

Founder of Ship Weddings(No Idea if There Are Still Any)

 

 

 Host of Bast

 

 

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redwolf988

Thanks Jasper, that's really nice of you. 

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CassLunice

 

Bump and Elemental Master

 

Pilot Of the Yellow Lion

 

Gang: Me, E, C, S, M, F, E, C, L, A, K

 

#Casper

The real reason girls wear dresses: we're too lazy to put on pants ~ Me

 

Full sig @ /283447

 

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dragonmoonlight221

BOO!

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                    Jasper

HUFFLEPUFF FOR THCUP

#Casper

 

Wizard

Seeker

Jedi Knight

Knight of Dawn

Caretaker

Demigod, Son of Athena

Priest of Thoth

 

Founder of Ship Weddings(No Idea if There Are Still Any)

 

 

 Host of Bast

 

 

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redwolf988

Boo to you two

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CassLunice

 

Bump and Elemental Master

 

Pilot Of the Yellow Lion

 

Gang: Me, E, C, S, M, F, E, C, L, A, K

 

#Casper

The real reason girls wear dresses: we're too lazy to put on pants ~ Me

 

Full sig @ /283447

 

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clevercat546

Oh my god you guys.

 

This chat thread has been going longer than I have been on SAMB.

 

On my other account, I mean.

 

You guys have known each other longer than probably any other SAMBer friends. Is there like, a world record? On SAMB? We should make that a thing.

 

Right, sorry to interrupt, I just had to put that out there.

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ǪǗĮĹĹ/ ĎĮƤƤẸŘ ƤĮŇẸŜ

    《He/She/They》

:SAMBer Since the End of 2015:

"We should take a moment and hold it and know life has a hopeful undertone." -Twenty One Pilots 

ɟlıdsıdǝ: qıll ɔıdɥǝɹ

Twin: Jokester

#Klance

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redwolf988

Haha, yeah Stormy and I became friends when I was still a little newbie this thread came around not too too long after. Several other friends stopped in from time to time making this even longer: Bleiz, Ruby, Cherry, Eris, Jasper, Kara, and many others. 

 

I don't know if there is a record book but I do know one of my old RPs still holds the title of being the longest running RP, that's probably where Storm and I really became friends even though we knew each other before that. I suppose it makes sense that two of the people who had the longest running RP would also have the longest running chat thread.

 

Don't worry about "interrupting" it's totally cool, everyone here is pretty chill.  

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CassLunice

 

Bump and Elemental Master

 

Pilot Of the Yellow Lion

 

Gang: Me, E, C, S, M, F, E, C, L, A, K

 

#Casper

The real reason girls wear dresses: we're too lazy to put on pants ~ Me

 

Full sig @ /283447

 

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clevercat546

I'm not familiar with Bleiz, Eris, or Kara. But I do know Jasper, Cherry, and Ruby. Funny thing is, I know them, but they would not remember me. *Shrugs*

 

We're going to make a record book. Watch for the thread.

 

Oh yay haha

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ǪǗĮĹĹ/ ĎĮƤƤẸŘ ƤĮŇẸŜ

    《He/She/They》

:SAMBer Since the End of 2015:

"We should take a moment and hold it and know life has a hopeful undertone." -Twenty One Pilots 

ɟlıdsıdǝ: qıll ɔıdɥǝɹ

Twin: Jokester

#Klance

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dragonmoonlight221

So you’re a former SAMBer with a different account?

 

Wow, this has been going on for a long time.

 

Cassy has a gift for making RPs that last a long time. Most die out like three days after they start.

 

Im watching for the thread.

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                    Jasper

HUFFLEPUFF FOR THCUP

#Casper

 

Wizard

Seeker

Jedi Knight

Knight of Dawn

Caretaker

Demigod, Son of Athena

Priest of Thoth

 

Founder of Ship Weddings(No Idea if There Are Still Any)

 

 

 Host of Bast

 

 

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stormbreeze48

Yeah uhhhh plenty of people have interrupted us and it's cool my dude. That's why Jasper is here.

 

Hmmm, do you remember your old SAMB name? Maybe it'll sound familiar...

 

Im at a hotel in Brazil. The air conditioning is freezing, but after walking around in a place close to equator, it's always welcomed. I went to a miniature zoo nearby... it's very small, but anyways... there was a monkey outside of the cage. Yeah, it was just running around. It kept on trying to get back to its cage... I think it was the mom because it kept on going towards the baby. But it kept on going towards the cage I now general and looking for a way back in, but it couldn't find one and neither could we. It was crazy. There was a hotel guy that came and took pictures and left, and someone from our group told them about it... so hopefully that guy was taking pictures for evidence for animal control and that it will be put back in its cage. It was a white bellied spider monkey to be exact. The thing was kind of scary because it's a monkey, and it would walk in all fours with its tail sticking up so it looked like a dog... but then it's hands were there instead of feet, because monkeys have hand-feet, so then the hands were large compared to the legs and it was weird. And it had its special parts hanging out too. Sometimes it would move towards you and it was scary because it's a monkey and it's coming at you and aaaaaah. I didn't get touched. It wrapped its hands around one woman's legs for a few seconds, but she was fine with it. Then it pulled on another young woman's hair because she was bent over trying to talk to it and comfort it because she loves animals. She put it up I need a bun and continued following it. It didn't bite anyone so everyone should be safe. I guess its sad because the enclosure was bad enough to where it escaped... but... it was funny too because it got out of the cage... so as long as the monkey doesn't get hurt and humans don't get hurt, and they fix the enclosure, then there's no harm, right? I got a ton of pictures too it was crazy.

 

God Loves You All!

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*~Storm~*

 

"Do not be overcome by evil,

but overcome evil with good."

~Romans 12:21

 

 

Fullsig@/272051

 

#Pray

#Casper #Midoraka #Xcurgle #Glaudia

#NiceDeliveryDudes #EveryPersonNeedsAKazoo

#Moresigspa-

 



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dragonmoonlight221

I’m organizing a reunion. See how many of the old gang I can get back together. Lukas, Blaise, Sunshine, you guys, Ruby, Crazy.

 

 

Can I count on you guys to be there?

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                    Jasper

HUFFLEPUFF FOR THCUP

#Casper

 

Wizard

Seeker

Jedi Knight

Knight of Dawn

Caretaker

Demigod, Son of Athena

Priest of Thoth

 

Founder of Ship Weddings(No Idea if There Are Still Any)

 

 

 Host of Bast

 

 

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dragonmoonlight221

Hello?

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                    Jasper

HUFFLEPUFF FOR THCUP

#Casper

 

Wizard

Seeker

Jedi Knight

Knight of Dawn

Caretaker

Demigod, Son of Athena

Priest of Thoth

 

Founder of Ship Weddings(No Idea if There Are Still Any)

 

 

 Host of Bast

 

 

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dragonmoonlight221

Ok. Here’s the deal. I’m working on a story. I’m calling it the Order of Change. Nobody has read it yet. I have about eight chapters. I tried putting in the whole thing, but it crashed my Safari. So the first will be coming in soon.

 

You are the first to read it. Please, give honest opinions, edits, and constructive feedback. I need editors. Thanks.

 

 

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                    Jasper

HUFFLEPUFF FOR THCUP

#Casper

 

Wizard

Seeker

Jedi Knight

Knight of Dawn

Caretaker

Demigod, Son of Athena

Priest of Thoth

 

Founder of Ship Weddings(No Idea if There Are Still Any)

 

 

 Host of Bast

 

 

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dragonmoonlight221

Here we go.

 

 

 

Prologue


        An old man sat down stiffly, surrounded by his grandchildren. He took a few moments to catch his breath, and one of his grandchildren said impatiently, “Grandfather, we want to hear the story!” The old man gave a weak chuckle, and said, “Don’t worry, Alcazar. In my own time, one way or another, by the end of this weekend, you will have heard the whole story.”

      The man said, “Now, I’ve told you all many stories about the Order of Change, right?” All the children nodded. The man continued, “But I’ve never told you how they began, have I?” As the kids shook their heads, their parents stood outside the room quietly, waiting to hear the story that they had been told only once or twice in their entire childhood.

     The man leaned back in his chair and said, “Well, then here it is.”


Chapter 1


   Once upon a time, there were four worlds. All revolved around the same sun, but none knew of the other’s existence. But in the heavens, there lived four good Fairies. They saw that the time was ripe for the worlds to learn of each other, but they knew that the rulers would not do to make contact. So they sent dreams to four people, one from each world, and hoped that they would come together.

  

…………………………………………….……………………………………………………


     Harper was floating through the sky. She knew vaguely that she was in a dream, but it didn’t matter much. A figure with wings drifted towards her in the clouds. The figure emerged, and was a fairy. But this fairy was huge! Or at least, much bigger than the regular ones she had seen. Harper thought, “This can’t be a real fairy.” The fairy said in a deep voice, “Welcome, child.”

    Harper said indignantly, “Welcome yourself! This is my dream!” The fairy laughed, a rich, light laugh. The fairy said, “Oh, you are feisty. Spring was right about you.” Harper asked, “Who are you?” The fairy answered, “My name is Summer. I am the guardian Fairy of Uda. I have sent you this dream because I need to tell you something.” Harper said, “Okay, sure. You sent me this dream from outer space in your UFO so you could warn me about the aliens that will soon be coming to Uda. Fire away.” Summer smiled, and then began.

    

…………………………………………………………………………………………………


      Soren looked at Winter, dumbfounded. “There are three other worlds? And you are a part of a group of all-powerful Fairies who created the entire universe? And I’m supposed to make contact with three other people on totally different worlds?”

      Winter said softly, “Yes. That’s all.” Soren looked at Winter for a little while, his mouth hanging open. After a few minutes, Winter said to himself, “Oh dear. I told Autumn this would happen. He’s gone insane from information overload.” Suddenly, Soren burst out laughing.

      Winter jumped to his feet, and asked, startled, “What?” Soren said through tears, “I just remembered. This is a dream. None of this is real. I shouldn’t believe anything you say, because you’re just a figment of my imagination.”


…………………………………………………………………………………………………


      Spring said pompously, “How dare you, good sir! I am most certainly not a figment of your imagination! Everything I told you is absolutely true!” Lukas answered, “Of course you think you aren’t.”

      Spring said angrily, “Fine. Don’t believe me. I’ll prove it to you soon.” Lukas said in disbelief, “Yeah, okay. See you then, I guess.”


…………………………………………………………………………………………………


      Autumn waved her hand, and Elena woke up. She sat up in her bed, the sunlight streaming in through her curtains. The owner of the house stuck her head in through the door, and said, “Elena! You have a patient waiting! He says it’s urgent!”

     Elena groaned and said, “Alright, Governa. I’m getting up.” Elena quickly changed into her mysterious healer robe, a long white dress with gold fringes. She went out into her healing room, and sat down in front of the man waiting for her.

    She said, “Ah, Mr. Beasley. What’s the trouble today?” The old man grumbled, “I’ve been up half the morning listening to the dog across the street barking like there’s no tomorrow! Can you make it shut up?” Elena said gently, “As I’ve told you before, Mr. Beasley, I am a healer, not a miracle worker. If you do not have a distinct ailment that you are ill from, or in pain, that is not my department. I would suggest talking to the dog’s owner to ask it to keep the dog as quiet as possible.”

      Mr. Beasley grumbled, “Fine.” Elena said, “But I will prescribe you two medicines. One will help you sleep, and the others prevents hallucinations. If the sleeping one doesn’t work, take the hallucination medicine. You should feel fine soon.” Mr. Beasley left the room, and Governa brought in the next patient. Elena looked at her schedule for that day, and sighed. This was going to be a long day.

     Elena looked up at her next patient, and said brightly, “How may I help you, Mrs. Gutierrez?”

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                    Jasper

HUFFLEPUFF FOR THCUP

#Casper

 

Wizard

Seeker

Jedi Knight

Knight of Dawn

Caretaker

Demigod, Son of Athena

Priest of Thoth

 

Founder of Ship Weddings(No Idea if There Are Still Any)

 

 

 Host of Bast

 

 

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stormbreeze48

Yeah, I should be there for the reuinion, but... good luck finding everyone. That's gonna be rough.

Okay, for the story...
-could you describe the grandchildren and the grandpa a bit better? are they human or fairies? because later it has fairies. and im assuming they're at the grandpa's house? im imagining him sitting down in a chair by the fire in some log cabin or smth. since you're in third person omniscient in the prolouge, you should be able to do that. you don't have to go into too much detail, i'd just mainly like to know if they're fairies and where they are.

-i feel like the first paragraph of chapter 1 should go in the prolouge. the prolouge is more for setting up the story, but the first chapter(s) are for introducing the characters. i mean yeah there's exposistion, but with chapter 1 it seems like you're introducing the characters, so i feel like it should be moved to the prolouge

-if possible, why do the 4 worlds need to be reunited or smth? i'd like to hear the full explanation of the fairies. if im gonna do some world saving stuff i gotta know why, you know? i mean i bet thats probably for a little bit later or smth but still. id like more details on that and i feel like it should go in the recruitment part. it was only mentioned that it was time, but never any specific reason. 

-with the worlds, try to make them as diverse as possible. or if they were apart of all one world, then yeah they could probably be somewhat similar and they do all seem to have fairies but be sure to flush out the worlds. they can all survive on their own so i guess they're skilled at everything and they're bound to have lots of animals for lots of food and lots of plants for supplies. do they all have the same animals or does each land have something different? just try and make it diverse and stuff. more of a note for future reference and such. i like it when a story has a flushed out world and i find that really interesting.

-i want a reaction of elana. we got to see all of their reactions to the thing that really shows their personalities, but for eden all we see is that she's reluctantly getting out of bed to put up with a bunch of people... so i guess that does show that she's patient but... still want to see more of her reaction though!

-i feel like you could introduce the fairies a bit better. like for the characters, they're the main characters, so it makes sense for no formal introduction. but these fairies are different. they're new characters. and all of a sudden, it feels like, they're there. you can infer that they're the other 3 guardian fairies and those are their names, but i feel like you need to be more specific.

 

-i guess my overall critique is just to add some more details and make sure you have enough details in the future 

other than that its pretty good. 

 

God Loves You All! 

 

 

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*~Storm~*

 

"Do not be overcome by evil,

but overcome evil with good."

~Romans 12:21

 

 

Fullsig@/272051

 

#Pray

#Casper #Midoraka #Xcurgle #Glaudia

#NiceDeliveryDudes #EveryPersonNeedsAKazoo

#Moresigspa-

 



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redwolf988

I have to agree with Storm on the detail factor. A good writer needs to incorporate all five senses into their writing so the readers feel as though they are in the story. But don't go overboard with description that you deter people from reading. Like don't spend a whole page describing a doorknob. If you've read my when stars fall story the first chapter is an example of what not to do, I cringe when I reread it.

 

The writing style overall is childish which is typical for people our age but it's not something that should be ignored if you want to continue writing. For starters put it in a google doc or word document, from there put the story in proper formating. This means all dialogue stands alone with possibly a statement before or after addressing who is speaking (Also adding on you shouldn't you should put said before it, it's not " Darkth Vader said: 'Luke I am your father'." It's either "Darth Vader raised his hand as he spoke 'Luke I am your fatherfather'." Or "'Luke I am your father,' Darth Vader said.") Also every time the thought, mood, or action of the story changes it is a new paragraph. Put the story in times new roman font and make the size either 12 or 14. A chapter should be roughly ten to twenty pages long. I struggle with that though typically mine come out to 7-16 pages so just focus on trying to fluff out the chapters. Currently it is how one would write a POV not a story, it's too blunt and to the point without really getting to know the every day lives of your characters, or the world they are in or even what time period this reflects. This goes back to the detail factor. 

 

In order to not confuse readers you shouldn't have the narrator switching between characters in the middle of a chapter unless the characters are together in the same place and you cleverly just stick to the second character while the original leave the scene for a moment. This is still frowned upon most of the time, most saying you should purely stick to one character. It's not always followed though. A good example is the Spirit Animals series. Each chapter is well flushed out explaining one character at a time per each chapter. Also don't breakup your chapter with lines. The inbetween chapters is the transition between time and or characters. If you need time to pass during a chapter describe it a uneventful or passing swiftly. 

 

Sorry if this sounds harsh, I'm just trying to be honest for what a mature audience would want. Don't get me wrong it's a good start and a great idea but it needs a little work. 

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CassLunice

 

Bump and Elemental Master

 

Pilot Of the Yellow Lion

 

Gang: Me, E, C, S, M, F, E, C, L, A, K

 

#Casper

The real reason girls wear dresses: we're too lazy to put on pants ~ Me

 

Full sig @ /283447

 

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stormbreeze48

Yeah, if you think about an actual book, chapters tend to be a lot longer than that. 

 

Also whoag Cass nice siggy. Pilot of the yellow lion, hmm? Guess I'll pilot green then. I'm kind of a mix of those two. But I'd rather have the green lion because the yellow lion is too slow for me. I'd prefer quick and fast attacks... so I guess red would be cool, but I'm not reckless like Keith is, so I wouldn't fit.

 

God Loves You All! 

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*~Storm~*

 

"Do not be overcome by evil,

but overcome evil with good."

~Romans 12:21

 

 

Fullsig@/272051

 

#Pray

#Casper #Midoraka #Xcurgle #Glaudia

#NiceDeliveryDudes #EveryPersonNeedsAKazoo

#Moresigspa-

 



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