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tsunamininja5

It was a quiz

 

17 questions

 

And I stayed for an extra  H O U R

 

Class is already an hour and a half. o_o

 

 

So if that was the quiz

 

Imagine how long I'll be there for the unit test. o_o

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Also known as Samurai

Est. January 2014

 

Author of the Path of Legends series - coming 2020!

 

"Fear not in this Time of Chaos, this War of Darkness. For on the horizon, there shines a light, a light brighter than any before . . ."

 

 

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tsunamininja5

Oof

 

I feel bad skipping taekwondo but I'm too tired ;-;

 

I know that's a lame excuse but seriously

 

If I'm not going to give my best, I shouldn't go.

 

Also Florence needs to like

 

Not

 

Because I need my Saturday five hour training, thank you very much

 

We're not in the worst of it, but we're going to get a ton of rain and lots of wind

 

Driving might not be safe...

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"Fear not in this Time of Chaos, this War of Darkness. For on the horizon, there shines a light, a light brighter than any before . . ."

 

 

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brownlynx107

yea, the hurricane n' all

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tsunamininja5

Oof

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"Fear not in this Time of Chaos, this War of Darkness. For on the horizon, there shines a light, a light brighter than any before . . ."

 

 

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tsunamininja5

I should be studying math but I have zero motivation right now

 

...

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"Fear not in this Time of Chaos, this War of Darkness. For on the horizon, there shines a light, a light brighter than any before . . ."

 

 

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tsunamininja5

I have to finish the prologue of my wizard story TODAY in THIS CLASS but I have no idea what to write.

 

I was REALLY SMART (not) and decided to submit it for my writing assignment...

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Est. January 2014

 

Author of the Path of Legends series - coming 2020!

 

"Fear not in this Time of Chaos, this War of Darkness. For on the horizon, there shines a light, a light brighter than any before . . ."

 

 

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tsunamininja5

Haha I'm fine what are you talking about

 

Taekwondo was great today, of course

 

I'm perfectly okay :)

 

Totally didn't hide in the bathroom the entire class

 

Totally didn't skip the intern training (well, he told me to . . . which was fine because I literally can't put up with -cough cough- some of the interns right now)

 

And guess who's NOT going to class tomorrow

 

Because Instructor Hates-My-Guts is teaching

 

Funny, just when I was starting to think he didn't hate me so much . . .

 

My friend/instructor said it's not true and that hate is a really strong word, but I mean . . . where's the evidence that it's NOT true?

 

 

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Author of the Path of Legends series - coming 2020!

 

"Fear not in this Time of Chaos, this War of Darkness. For on the horizon, there shines a light, a light brighter than any before . . ."

 

 

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tsunamininja5

There's a lot more I want to rant about

 

But I only have five more minutes of internet, so

 

 

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"Fear not in this Time of Chaos, this War of Darkness. For on the horizon, there shines a light, a light brighter than any before . . ."

 

 

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tsunamininja5

. . . 

 

I still feel horrible about today.

 

And I'm sorry, I don't think I can fix anything. I've tried. I've tried to pick up all the broken pieces and put them back together.

 

But it's too late.

 

I want to be an instructor; I really do. But I can't overcome this. And no, your desire to reach a goal is not stronger than self-doubt, pain, regret, and self-hatred. I'm sorry. It's not. Maybe it is for you, but I'm not you. I'm not strong. Maybe I used to be strong, maybe I used to be confident, but the person I used to be has faded into shadows as empty as the shell I've become.

 

The ironic thing is that I have a black belt, size 4, with my name stitched into it in Korean. But am I a black belt? No. My black belt test is a terrible memory, and my black belt itself . . . what does it even mean? How can it stand for anything when I myself stand for nothing but brokenness and emptiness?

 

Just when everything starts to be okay again, just when I start to heal, it all has to break again. I wish I wasn't so fragile. All it took was him (the instructor who hates me), just him, and that "okay-ness" was gone.

 

I want to like him. But he makes it impossible. It's been like this since I came here.

 

I want to say this is my fault, but I'm tired of blaming myself for everything. Guess what? You're a taekwondo instructor. Do your job. You can't ignore a student just because they intimidate you with their angst.

 

I keep trying to convince myself to like you. I keep trying to convince myself that it's not your fault, it's my fault, and-

 

But I can't, okay, because all you do is ignore me until I mess up and then all of a sudden OH LOOK SAMURAI EXISTS I GOTTA YELL AT HER

 

I don't care if you weren't actually yelling, you were being all salty so I'm calling it yelling

 

And it was because of you that I hid in the bathroom for the rest of class

 

Hm. 

 

 

 

 

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"Fear not in this Time of Chaos, this War of Darkness. For on the horizon, there shines a light, a light brighter than any before . . ."

 

 

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tsunamininja5

Wow, my post went through

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"Fear not in this Time of Chaos, this War of Darkness. For on the horizon, there shines a light, a light brighter than any before . . ."

 

 

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tsunamininja5

Jeremy said he wants me to come back but I don't know if I should...

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Author of the Path of Legends series - coming 2020!

 

"Fear not in this Time of Chaos, this War of Darkness. For on the horizon, there shines a light, a light brighter than any before . . ."

 

 

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tsunamininja5

. . .

 

So I think I'm just going to disappear into my writing for a while and like

 

Not go to taekwondo

 

. . . except I want to know if Jeremy read what I sent him yet

 

Did he like it or was it horrible

 

What does he think of Akira

 

And Loki

 

And Sasaki

 

 

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"Fear not in this Time of Chaos, this War of Darkness. For on the horizon, there shines a light, a light brighter than any before . . ."

 

 

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tsunamininja5

I would talk about today but I don't trust myself not to say something I'll regret later....

 

....Let's just say I'm very hurt right now....

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"Fear not in this Time of Chaos, this War of Darkness. For on the horizon, there shines a light, a light brighter than any before . . ."

 

 

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brownlynx107

I’m Sorry. Is there anything I can do to help? 

I know there isn’t a delete button, but you can still rant to me, if you want.

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tsunamininja5

My computer "ran into an error and needed to restart" so my whole post just got deleted.

 

-sigh-

 

Taekwondo has been getting worse every time I go, for one thing.

 

I would elaborate but I don't want to get sent to counseling because I'm on school WiFi and they're probably reading everything

 

That, and the mods would ban me again or something

 

. . . but instructor training is over, so that happened

 

I got kicked out for not being positive and enthusiastic enough

 

But I wanted to quit anyway because their intern program wasn't helping me at all but I wasn't sure how to tell him that . . . I tried, but I never got past "So . . . with the . . . intern program . . ."

 

But I still feel . . . unwanted? Rejected? I don't think that's how he wanted it to come across but that's how I took it . . .

 

. . . so I'm hurt . . .

 

. . . and kind of angry . . .

 

. . . even though I know that's not how he meant it . . .

 

 

 

 

 

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"Fear not in this Time of Chaos, this War of Darkness. For on the horizon, there shines a light, a light brighter than any before . . ."

 

 

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tsunamininja5

Oof

 

I still don't feel great but we're good now

 

And we're the only ones who know about it, so my cover-up story is "I quit" which isn't really a lie because I was going to anyway, so . . .

 

I tried to tell him that I think I have depression (don't know, though, because I feel okay-ish right now; not really sure what it is) but I can't flipping talk so I ended up saying stuff like "I can't" (talking about being positive) and he said, "Yes, you can" 

 

I felt kind of

 

I don't know

 

Not understood, I guess

 

But I'm horrible at talking about this stuff

 

So I only have myself to blame

 

 

 

 

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"Fear not in this Time of Chaos, this War of Darkness. For on the horizon, there shines a light, a light brighter than any before . . ."

 

 

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tsunamininja5

I think I'll be okay . . .

 

The Hater Instructor hates me even more than he did, but I don't care. I just worry about my friends now (which is really just Jeremy, now that I think about it . . . but that's okay, because he's one of my best friends). I'm not even sure if Hater Instructor actually hates me . . . but that's certainly how I'm perceiving it. He's one to talk about "intention versus impact".

 

I'm staying for now, although I'm not getting back into the intern program. I want the real instructor training, not this . . . which is what I tried to tell Jeremy but he's in charge of the intern program so I didn't want to sound like a [...].

 

I KNOW this isn't how they train real instructors, though, I know that for a fact . . .

 

Like if there's an adult student who's interested in being an instructor, they wouldn't do this . . . so . . . why can't those of us who are actually interested in doing this as a career do the real training?

 

I'm 16 . . . I don't want to train with 12-year-olds, sorry . . .

 

Anyway

 

As of right now I'm miserable here but Jeremy said I can talk to him if I need to

 

Maybe it'll get better

 

 

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"Fear not in this Time of Chaos, this War of Darkness. For on the horizon, there shines a light, a light brighter than any before . . ."

 

 

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brownlynx107

Happy birthdayyyyy! Yay, you and Foggo are the same age! I'm still a youngling lol.

It will get better, but the points you brought up do make sense. With the instructor training thing. huh. 

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tsunamininja5

Oof

 

(Actually my birthday is next month . . . but at this point I'm so close to 16 I started rounding up. XD Thanks, though!)

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"Fear not in this Time of Chaos, this War of Darkness. For on the horizon, there shines a light, a light brighter than any before . . ."

 

 

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brownlynx107

Mmm, i’m Still so young I should round down to 14 lol. :)

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tsunamininja5

XD

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"Fear not in this Time of Chaos, this War of Darkness. For on the horizon, there shines a light, a light brighter than any before . . ."

 

 

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tsunamininja5

Help me, I'm obsessed with Guren no Yumiya

 

Attack on Titan would probably give me nightmares

 

But

 

That song

 

o_o

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Author of the Path of Legends series - coming 2020!

 

"Fear not in this Time of Chaos, this War of Darkness. For on the horizon, there shines a light, a light brighter than any before . . ."

 

 

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challengermaster20

Oof I found my login for this

 

It says Osiris right now, ignore that

 

I wanted to call this account Osiris but I changed my mind

 

My new signature is taking forever to go through

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☯ Rigel

Also known as Samurai

Black Belt

Manga Artist

Writer

 

 

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tsunamininja5

Just here as a reminder:

 

- History Venn Diagram comparing Luther and Calvin

- Functions notes

- Canterbury Tales General Prologue quiz on Wednesday

- Submit something for Creative Writing - due next class

- Ask about clubs

- Starting a writing club?

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Author of the Path of Legends series - coming 2020!

 

"Fear not in this Time of Chaos, this War of Darkness. For on the horizon, there shines a light, a light brighter than any before . . ."

 

 

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tsunamininja5

So my Tarik story

 

I literally wrote it in twenty minutes

 

How did I do that

 

Usually it takes me two hours to write an incomplete sentence:

 

"Tarik opened the"

 

-two hours later-

 

"door"

 

-two hours later-

 

"and"

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Author of the Path of Legends series - coming 2020!

 

"Fear not in this Time of Chaos, this War of Darkness. For on the horizon, there shines a light, a light brighter than any before . . ."

 

 

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tsunamininja5

I have a test on the Canterbury Tales today

 

As in

 

In like

 

Ten minutes

 

How am I supposed to remember all of this

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"Fear not in this Time of Chaos, this War of Darkness. For on the horizon, there shines a light, a light brighter than any before . . ."

 

 

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tsunamininja5

...I'm not back

 

Just

 

Visiting, I guess :/

 

I'm way too old to be here (16 now, for real) but for whatever reason I can't let go of this place

 

I came here five years ago, wow

 

 

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"Fear not in this Time of Chaos, this War of Darkness. For on the horizon, there shines a light, a light brighter than any before . . ."

 

 

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brownlynx107

AAAHUKGNYUNFUNFRCF

 

*also there are kids in college here so you're never too old*

 

 

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tsunamininja5

Guess who hasn't gone to taekwondo for a week! -jazz hands-

 

No intention of going this week either

 

And I'm supposed to advance but it's just a piece of tape. I could go to Home Depot, buy some yellow duct tape, cut off a piece, write "2nd level" on it, slap it on my black belt, and it's basically the same thing.

 

So why even go anymore

 

. . . 

 

. . .

 

. . .

 

. . . I miss Jeremy, though.

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"Fear not in this Time of Chaos, this War of Darkness. For on the horizon, there shines a light, a light brighter than any before . . ."

 

 

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tsunamininja5

Hehe I forgot about this

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"Fear not in this Time of Chaos, this War of Darkness. For on the horizon, there shines a light, a light brighter than any before . . ."

 

 

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tsunamininja5

Stressed, depressed, and DBZ obsessed

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"Fear not in this Time of Chaos, this War of Darkness. For on the horizon, there shines a light, a light brighter than any before . . ."

 

 

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tsunamininja5

I can't get over how much Broly looks like Thorn

 

(Normal Broly, not Legendary Super Saiyan Broly)

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tsunamininja5

People are doing all of these star celebration things and I realized I've never done one

 

Hmm

 

12,181 stars if you're curious . . . -shrug- It's not like it matters.

 

And it's not like anyone actually reads this

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"Fear not in this Time of Chaos, this War of Darkness. For on the horizon, there shines a light, a light brighter than any before . . ."

 

 

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tsunamininja5

So much for posting writing

 

Apparently there's a character limit?

 

That's . . . irritating.

 

And we need a character limit why?

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"Fear not in this Time of Chaos, this War of Darkness. For on the horizon, there shines a light, a light brighter than any before . . ."

 

 

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tsunamininja5

Looking back at my posts from last year

 

Lol I was such a whiny little

 

Not that that's changed, ha

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Author of the Path of Legends series - coming 2020!

 

"Fear not in this Time of Chaos, this War of Darkness. For on the horizon, there shines a light, a light brighter than any before . . ."

 

 

I like the new Sig Sam ^-^ 

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                KEY   

 You think that I'm okay but I'm just hiding behind a smile  

 We'll get through this 

Twice as strong 

Still alive 

 

#SPAT

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tsunamininja5

Thank ye ^-^

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"Fear not in this Time of Chaos, this War of Darkness. For on the horizon, there shines a light, a light brighter than any before . . ."

 

 

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tsunamininja5

Me: -starts listening to Super Saiyan theme-

Computer: -dies-

 

The power was too much for it, I guess

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"Fear not in this Time of Chaos, this War of Darkness. For on the horizon, there shines a light, a light brighter than any before . . ."

 

 

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tsunamininja5

I made a writing wiki

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"Fear not in this Time of Chaos, this War of Darkness. For on the horizon, there shines a light, a light brighter than any before . . ."

 

 

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tsunamininja5

Skipping taekwondo like

 

Yeeeah

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"Fear not in this Time of Chaos, this War of Darkness. For on the horizon, there shines a light, a light brighter than any before . . ."

 

 

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